Does this post sound sad?

I need to make sure you guys are aware of this – I’ve linked two corgi-oriented sites recently. The one that I like the most is the one run by the owner of, she has her own tri-color corgi named Pudge and he is real cute and real ploofeh. She uses a lot of corgi-oriented words like “baroooo” which is apparently how corgis bark, “ploofeh” referring to how fluffy (or “floofeh”) a corgi’s coat is, and she uses herpderp to refer to a specific kind of corgi face (when their tongues are lolling out of their mouths). Pudge is real fucking cute. I spend a lot of time looking at his pictures.

I snatched up to 225lbs and c+jed 275lbs tonight, didn’t feel terribly strong. Managed to bench 250lbs for 5, 5, 5, 4 which is the best volume benching I’ve ever done, hopefully I’m good to take down 275lbs x 3 next week. High-bar squat 430lbs x 1 (attempted a second rep and got stapled), 405lbs for 4, 3.

I can’t reiterate enough how fucking good I feel benching when I’m keeping up with tacking-and-stretching my distal tris. It’s a fucking world of difference. When I keep up my basic routine and do the soft tissue work after particularly nasty workouts (like I will do it again tomorrow since I benched a lot tonight), I’m just a lot more fluid and I feel so much stronger driving off my chest and through the middle.

Same thing for squats and rolling out my glutes and high hammies. The sensation is completely different, I can keep my knees out better and it feels like so much more musculature is being utilized as I come out of the hole.

Tom asks:

Hey Brent, any issues with doing several mobs every day? Is there an over training (you know what I mean) equivalent for mobbing?

Not that I’m aware of. Doing some mobs pre-workout can make you feel too loose i.e. high hammy flossing or hip joint approximation seems to hurt my squats and oly lifts. But it’s when I don’t keep up with a regular routine that I feel shitty and can’t hit positions well and lose a lot of capacity for force production.

One of the doctors I work with likes to counsel me about girls a lot, or tries to play Cupid. When VPVG was at my clinic more often, I got a lot of counseling from him.

“Look, you just don’t have any game. You know, I watch you interact with her, I see how you guys talk, and you’re just too friendly. You’re too nice. Girls don’t like that. You need to make strong moves. You can’t leave anything in question. You just gotta say, ‘look, you’re hot. We should go out, you know? Let’s go out. Let’s have dinner. Are we gonna do this or what?’ And she’s seeing a guy long-distance, so what? When the cat’s away, the mice will play. That’s a saying. Oh, here she comes.”

“I know you’re talking about me,” she would then say as she walked between us to the front desk.

I’m supposed to be Allie’s Secret Santa at work. Allie’s a pretty cool chick – I am NOT her work husband. We are just two coworkers who talk about stuff together. She likes me because one time we had the following conversation:

Brent: “What’d you do this weekend?
Allie: “I went to a party.”
Brent: “Did you get yucky?”
Allie: “I got really yucky. My ex was there too and I made him cry.”
Brent: “I need to know this story.”

So she told me the story, her ex was at the party and said “hey we should get back together, you’re so hot tonight,” and she said “NO! You were awful to me and I would never give you another chance!” Then he text her for the rest of the night and cried. I loved this story. Anything to remind me that my misery is not unique, that there may be things wrong with me but there is something wrong with everyone, and really we are all just so many lonely people, getting yucky, crying at parties, grinding out PR squats, going to bed hurting and damaged, having faith in the idea of a vague tomorrow that might be just a little better.

Anyways, I know I am not Allie’s work husband and just a mutual friend because she jokes with me about my girlfriends, which I don’t have. When I called VPVG or vice versa on occasion for whatever reason on the clinic phones, she’d make jokes about “my little Asian girlfriend.” To which I’d have to respond “I wouldn’t say that, she doesn’t take me very seriously.” And Allie would be all encouraging saying funny stuff like “oh she just doesn’t know she loves you yet,” if only she knew who she was talking to.

I also know I am not her work husband because of this conversation that took place between the doctor and her:

Doctor: “So are you single?”
Allie: “Yeah. My life is over. I’m twenty-four, I’m supposed to be married right now. I should be thinking about kids. But I’m still in school. I live with my parents. I’m single. My life is over.”
Doctor: “Well tell me about what kind of guys you like. You know, I’m actually a very good matchmaker. I have a very high – the couples that I match have a very high success rate. I have a 100% success rate.”
Some Other Coworker: “What about Brent?”
Doctor (waving me off): “He’s a lost cause. He’s a failure. His inability to close deals has no reflection on my abilities to match couples. So what are you looking for in a guy?”
Allie: “Well I like a guy who is tall and athletic. Like he has to be *this tall.* And he has to have a job. He has to be smart, and he has to be funny.”
Doctor (pointing to me now): “Well what about him? He’s athletic. You know, he lifts weights or whatever. He’s – well I won’t say that he’s smart, but with the right ADD meds – ”
Allie: “… well he has to be *this tall* so …”

I wasn’t sitting ten feet away filing papers or anything while this discussion took place it’s fine. Inadequacy is a familiar feeling. You could say it’s one of my closest friends. The unconditional love and companionship of a corgi is looking real pleasant right about now.

No but really it’s fine. Allie’s cool and nice. I asked people what to get her and they said she really likes Twizzlers and Dr. Pepper so this’ll be easy. I’m probably going to get something I’m not going to use, like a protein powder from Walmart. It’s fine.

Joe writes:

Hey Brent, weirdest thin JUST happened. I was in a crowded Room with you and Justin for some reason and you two were wearing tank tops. Then you two were laughing really hard at some chick and I woke up. I don’t recall everything that happened but it made me wake up and I had to tell you. It’s fine. Ok that’s all. Stay safe.


tiny asks:

Brent, Hypothetical question, if you could be any animal, what would it be? No explanation please.

Duck-billed platypus.

Matt writes:

Why won’t you respond to my facebook friend request? Either way it’s fine…. please respond

I have like 20+ friend requests pending right now and they are pending because I don’t know who the FUCK these people are. Which Matt are you? I have like 3.

Pete writes:


brb sending me pictures of your poop, asking me who my favorite US president is, and not speaking fucking English then getting mad that I don’t text you back. Congrats on your house man. Great job with your training. Keep us updated with your pics and vids. Wanna see how freakin thick solid and tight you can get. Good luck with your bodybuilding and homeowner goals in 2012.

Leave a comment ?


  1. Get her a pair of shoe lifts that you’ll wear to be tall enough for her.

  2. I don’t know who the FUCK these people are. Which Matt are you? I have like 3.

    Matt Lindsey. I have a hot girl with me in my picture.

    Solid post. For Christmas is your Dad planning on taking you back to the same restaurant for both Lunch and Dinner?

  3. Hey Brent,

    Why isn’t everything different?

  4. Dude I fucked up and googled Corgi Puppy pictures. Fuck these things are cute.

  5. Read her some poetry. Bitches love poetry. Like this:”I had a dream of us holding hands miles from here, breaking free of this world, loving truly, the span of a moment, pure love unleashed.”

  6. I was going to friend you on FB and troll you for not accepting, then i took an arrow to the knee

  7. Hi, i’m here for the singles support group?

  8. This was a less depressed post than usual. I’m glad you’re having such an excellent day.

  9. I got a decent laugh out of this post… hey Brent you ever flirt with the idea of trying out standup comedy? Maybe You will be as good as bobby lee or the other asian comedians, except more jacked… btw that doctor you work with sounds like those “local gym heros” at your local 24 fitness or whatever commercial gyms most people go to. They weight about 220-235, relatively lean, 12 percent or less body fat. Bench one rep max is 315 for one shakey, grindy rep. Claims to have squatted over 5 plates but seems to be struggling with 405 for reps (medium stance, parallel. with belt). Also gives out somewhat unwanted information on how to get swolle, jacked, ripped, shredded, and last but not least, how to be ALPHA AS FUK. Sorry for the long post.

    • Because being 220-235, relatively lean and decently strong is totes gay?

    • because being a doctor who is 220-235, relatively lean, 12 percent or less body fat, has a 1rm max of 315 on bench and can grind out a set of 405# squats is such a terrible thing.

      • never said it was a terrible thing. just merely implying that being that size with that strength isnt anything impressive…now if he was benching 500 and squatting 600 maybe…its all relative. I’m merely saying that there are too many “gym gurus” that think they are the shit while they don’t see the big picture. They are not even close to elite strength and power.

  10. to reiterate about “doc cupid” or whatever alpha male name he thinks he should be called, he’s like the “kinda” strong guy in the gym giving everyone advice. Kinda like the 6’2 guy who feels really tall among a group of 5’10 guys… or that YMCA “legend” who can barely do a reverse dunk and keeps telling you how to handle the rock and claims he once tried out for a NBA team back in his prime.

    • he does a lot of cardio mainly and does the machines for resistance training

      he did some personal trainer’s “hardcore aerobics class” that involved a lot of bw exercises and whatnot and said he liked it

      he is a pretty cool dude though and one of my favorite doctors to work with, easy to joke with, i used to always joke about him writing an rx. for testosterone for me a lot

  11. I could go on and on about this rant but then I would simply be trolling…and trolling…

  12. is the distal triceps mob just a lacrosse ball to the area?

  13. Hey Brent, have you ever used one of these for mobbing?

    If so, thoughts?

    • I used one of those once at the physio’s office… i didnt really notice anything too great about it. Then again, i am a real gordon fuck so…

  14. Also, does “yucky” mean drunk, or more like rude and raunchy?

  15. Brent,

    When I mob the S-pouch I usually roll the area out with the ball and then do the whole take and stretch bit, but I am always finding nasty bits running up the outside of my quad (iliotibial bandish) and also along the inside of the knee like the vastus medialis. I try to roll those but it makes me feel like im going to poop my pants… should i just foam roll those for a while or suck it up?

  16. nutsack attack fly boy holler

    Cool story Hans Christian Anderson

    Cool 2009 meme reference

    At least I can no longer say I’ve been lascked from your blog for eternity

    I’ve made it, my time here is done. This is my swan song.

    Fuck you vale, fuck you puke, fuck you criedthefox. I’ll go listen to Skrillex and drop acid now.

    • Dude, i’m gonna type as sober as possible, that honestly looks ****ing pathetic and digusting compared to my meal. and I’m being one hundred percent serious. Sorry we dont cook **** that was perviously in cans. you’re a fuking joke dude, and im dead fuking serious. gert areal family that cooks good food, drinks beer and wine and winecoolers and has a good fuking time, and has a milliondollar house on the beach, im seriously.. dont eever potst your fuking families poverty dinner on these forums ever the fuk again bro, and by bro i mean never my bro, fuking ***got.

  17. “Anything to remind me that my misery is not unique, that there may be things wrong with me but there is something wrong with everyone, and really we are all just so many lonely people, getting yucky, crying at parties, grinding out PR squats, going to bed hurting and damaged, having faith in the idea of a vague tomorrow that might be just a little better.”

    EPIC. So I teach college kids. (Insert “wish i cared” here.) My students this semester are pretty jacked, and so I basically spent the semester teaching them this through Dostoevsky and Arnold clips. They loved it. 40 college kids and me, grinding out PRs, crying and miserable, because we’re all forever alone.jpg. Even the ones with cute little college dorm relationships. EVERYONE DIES ALONE.

  18. really lonely guy

    there’s a lot of angry, disgruntled, sexually frustrated guys on this blog…guess squats and milk don’t solve all problems in life.

  19. “Duck-billed platypus. ”

    …….but no one would mount you?

  20. when people try to play matchmaker with me, they get told to mind their own god damn mother fucking business

  21. Get her some leaves…..
    Bitches love leaves

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