Felt a little tight power cleaning but still worked up to 245lbs for a double, hit some RDLs at 315lbs. Squatting seems to be green-lighted for now.

Haven’t really done anything cool, just a bunch of squatting, benching, pressing, RDLs and curls. I hit a 250lbs x 5 bench without a belt, that’s kind of insignificant though. Squat 315lbs x 10 high bar? Hey guys I was talking to a girl named Cristina from Nationals and she told me about Jennifer Thompson, she lifts at 132lbs and benches 292lbs raw. I guess I should stop fucking blogging about training. I guess I should just stop fucking training all together.

In case you missed it from the comments, my conceptualization of the friend zone:

there is an underlying sense of failure in everything that happens to me – the girl might have invited me out but i’ve crossed the event horizon into the black hole of the friend zone. there is no escape. from the outside you see me in slow-motion, getting rejected by girls as i meet them. inside the event horizon, everything is a blur. i am friend zoned so quickly that i’m unable to keep track of how many girls do it to me.

Follow-up to the girl I’ve mentioned – she’s moved back to New Jersey, almost completely unannounced. That Saturday night was apparently a going-away thing, though she didn’t declare it as such. She was going to go to school here but after leaving her boyfriend she had expressed concern at being able to pay all her bills on her own and had also talked about going to school back at home being much easier and cheaper.

Hey Brent wanna hang out? Oh you’re out of town, that’s fine, I’m just leaving Plano tomorrow forever we’ll never see each other again it was good talking to you though bye!

Operation Fuck Competition I’m Just Flexing In The Mirror is going well, I ordered soffe running shorts last week and they came in today, I am wearing a pair now and they are real fucking short, like, my boxer briefs are longer than the shorts. Need to pick up tank tops from Target soon. I want my wardrobe to be kind of like Justin’s but not completely mirror it. I just want to be two guys wearing soffe shorts and tank tops doing curls together but not identical twin-like.

I hung out with Saul and Becky, aka antigen/RUNITAGAIN and Thunderthighs on 70sbig. They are pretty cool – Saul, your official callsign is Paleo One. He’s pretty hardcore about it and pretty awesome. He’s also an excellent StarCraft 2 player. While we were walking to a restaurant they made a stop at a sidewalk where there were some railings embedded in concrete and used them as a dip stand. Saul hasn’t had a gym to train at so he’s been doing ring/gymnastics-oriented stuff, which includes hanging from the 2nd story rafter of his apartment in front of the stairs and doing one-arm pull ups while he hangs precariously over the edge of the railing. It’s pretty safe.

I’ve made more IRL friends through 70s big than I have from actual IRL in the past six months. Nathan, Mariah, Jacob, Jake Briskin, Saul, Becky, (Thom?? Does webcam chatting count as IRL if we are ICBMs (inter-continental best mates)?) I love you guys.

To everyone speaking in bro-talk in the comments (mainly Chris and oldman), please continue. I enjoy having a mini-Misc in the comments of my posts.

Mike asks,

should all the dudes who can’t clean 188k just end it now? [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HUj5Ld5U83Q] also would you hit it?

I absolutely would not bang Jang Mi-Ran. But what do you think about this:

CoolStoryBro asks,

Brent, how do you feel about this image?
http://i51.tinypic.com/n2cyg6.jpg

I actually am friends with that guy, his name is Brandon and he was a Masters Zerg for a while before he stopped playing.

Me and Saul will be training sometime this week (I told him I have Wednesday off but upon checking my schedule this might not be the case …) and I will definitely have tank tops by then, expect mildly homoerotic pictures in the next post.

Last night, as we were driving away from the airport to forage for food before Justin landed (we took separate flights back to DFW):

Mike, while looking at his phone: “There should be a Fuddruckers around here.”

Chris: “I don’t see it.”

This moment to me is the epitome of our interaction. The opportunity for productive communication is there – Chris could have responded with “Where is it” or “Give me directions,” but instead chose the intentionally obtuse response, “I don’t see it, therefore it doesn’t exist.”

+ + +

I woke up Saturday morning to Mike standing over me, pantomiming shaving his face violently, then looking distantly up out the window while pointing and saying “shhh.” He referenced scenes like this at least three times every hour, and had a prop to use as the razor 87% of the time.

+ + +

I spent the four hour flight to Newark, New Jersey sitting between Chris, who now apparently competes in the SPF 308lbs and under weight class, and Mike, who, before he started powerlifting, went on countless bulk and cut cycles when he didn’t have a show to do. Because of that experience, Mike is a master of controlling his body weight and can gain or lose weight pretty much just by thinking about it. He gained 30lbs in about six weeks? He was walking around at 270lbs for the meet. Anyways I sat between these two fuck faces and it fucking blew.

+ + +

Just as an aside, when we drove from the airport to forage for food, we didn’t actually find any. We drove for about 20min on the highway aimlessly and achieved nothing. Mission failed, special forces isn’t in our future. Mariah, does this sound familiar to you? It should.

+ + +

Chris took his shirt off for the deadlift. While he was walking around with the straps of his singlet down, he began flexing his left and right pecs alternately, which turned into saying, “COME ON DO IT KILL ME I’M HERE DO IT NOW” while flexing his pecs. Two ladies in the warm-up room, one of whom is a USAPL official from Texas, loved it.

+ + +

While training with Justin at a black-iron gym in Scranton called Peffer’s Gym, we met a guy from the 101st who was pretty cool, just this fucking guy who didn’t give a shit about periodization, Starting Strength, or ratios who benched 315lbs for reps and was a pretty jacked 240lbs. He told me to get off the books and catch some sun and vitamin D. He asked me if I was a mathematician, and when I told him I took x-rays he said, “Oh you seemed like you did something in mechanical engineering or some shit.” He also told me and Justin to go to several bars to get some tail and said it’d be easy for Justin, then pointed to me and said “you, too, two guys who are in shape, you’d get some action real easy.” I said ok.

+ + +

The girl from work I mention in the post below this one called me from work on Saturday night.

“Hey Brent, it’s Angie, some friends and I were going to go out and I was wondering if you wanted to come out with us.”

I look at Mike, Chris, Chad, and Justin in the loud, obnoxious college bar we were eating at and said, “I would actually love to go out with you tonight but I’m in Scranton, Pennsylvania. I would much rather hang out with you than the fuck heads I’m with right now.”

“You’re where?”

“Scranton, Pennsylvania. I’m getting filmed for The Office.”

“You’re lying. Are you really?”

“No not really but I really am in Scranton. I would have liked to go out with you though. Maybe next time.”

“Oh okay. Well I guess I’ll see you when you get back. Bye, I hope you have fun in Scranton!”

Guess I’ll fucking kill myself.

+ + +

I’ll let the guys do their own recap, I don’t really give a fuck about lifting anymore and if you haven’t seen my announcement on the 70s big facebook I am officially retiring from competition to train for flexing in the mirror and slaying mildly attractive pussy. They all did great though, they all missed a few attempts here and there but PRed nonetheless. Chad killed his 3rd attempt dead, something like a 15-20lbs PR like it was an 80% lift, Mike PRed on squat and bench, Chris PRed on bench and deadlift. I shoveled shit and played StarCraft 2.

Mike Kim asks:

do you think those korean star craft professionals take drugs like ritalin and adderall and cocaine.

I fucking hope so.

Some fucking guy asks:

brent u never reply to any of the comments. so how long of a “break” are u taking to rest?

I took a few days off and started rehab by day 4 which was bodyweight squats and progressed each day from there, and on Saturday I did 275lbs for a few sets of 10. RDLs started last Wednesday I think, first with the bar, then 135lbs, and on Sat I did 155lbs for like 13. Improvement has been good, and the hamstrings get less tight and feels more normal after every workout. I don’t think I can pull heavy or do the snatch or clean yet, still feels like it could pull on squats and RDLs if I move too violently.

CoolStoryBro asks:

Brent what do you reccomend for guys that cant bench their bodyweight for worksets on linear progression? Im thinking something along the lines of killing myself.

You should only kill yourself if you’re a pussy virgin mormon about it and bitch and moan and make excuses for why you’re not stronger. We all have our own obstacles to overcome. Be consistent and work hard. If that doesn’t work for you, just post on the Starting Strength boards and pretend people give a fucking shit.

A bunch of fucking guys ask:

lol there is sure a lot of negative comments. however, i would really like to know why u hate frank yang.

Because he’s fucking Frank Yang? Have you seen his videos? Have you read his blog? There really shouldn’t be any question.

Hey guys I’m gonna go I’ll talk to you here in a little bit.

In case you guys missed it in the comments. I fucking hate Frank Yang.

Snatched 215lbs x 2, high-bar back squat 390lbs x 5, 5, 4.

So against all wisdom I shot for the double leg and got the girl’s number.

Things that I’m doing wrong:

1.) I work with her
2.) 5 days out of a one year relationship with someone who she will always love
3.) still living with said ex, though he is supposedly leaving
4.) I should prob just fucking kill myself

She does it for me though so I will hopefully sink the shot in deep, sweep the hips, and take side mount. I have already gotten into a rather heated argument with her about whether or steroid use is a bad or good thing. She’s a pretty hardcore geek. See this video of Erin from The Office to see what our conversations are like. I enjoy them.

Update to this: I think I’m friend zoned, guess I’ll kill myself.

Update to training: I pulled my hamstring on a warm-up deadlift. I was supersetting bench and deadlift because I had 30min to train and went 135lbs x 5, 225lbs x 5, 315lbs x 3, 365lbs x 1, and pulled it at 395lbs x 1. Felt a pop, it tightened up and I couldn’t squat deep or do any pulling after. I could walk OK, though as the day went on at work it start to hurt. At home I noticed point tenderness with no bruising or swelling, iced it 4x for 20mins, today it doesn’t hurt to walk and the only thing that hurts is squatting to a toilet and hip flexion to end range with straight knees. Prob not good to lift for raw nationals though, not that I really give a shit, powerlifting is fucking checkers. It just wouldn’t be smart, either … I’m not even in 181, I weigh 163-164 at best, I’d post a shitty total injured, and the risk of making the hamstring strain worse or delaying recovery from hitting 1rms is quite frankly not worth it.

Don’t fucking tell me “I’m sorry to hear,” “that sucks, Brent,” or anything similar to that because it’s only going to fucking irritate me, I couldn’t care less that you give a shit and I couldn’t care less about totaling less than 1400lbs at any body weight. Competing mainly makes me want to fucking kill myself anyway so this should mean I’ll have a better time since I’ll be banging out curls in the warm up room with Justin.

Justin: “it’s only going to fucking irritate me,” you KNOW everyone is going to comment and say that now
me: fuck
Justin: even the guys who don’t comment
me: that’s fine
Justin: they will all fuck with you
me: lol
Justin: this will be so awesome
me: i know
Justin: I can’t wait
me: the guys who post on myh blog represent the coolest part of the 70s big community
Justin: hahahahahah, i lol’d
me: because it’s people who want to hang out with me, just a bunch of assholes who want to bust everyon’es balls

Mike Kim, who has no relation to me, writes:

i think i’m catching up brent. that was basically the same session i had today in terms of the classic lifts except a higher cj – i’ll be going for 300 this week (which is what i fs). what are your weightlifting training totals right now?

I’ve hit 107/125 with bumpers and you will have another 2-3 weeks to surpass me since I’ll be doing light lower body shit but I’m gonna get real fucking serious after recovery, hope you’ve brought enough thunder.

Let’s start this off with a bang:

This is a really good vid, you will like it.

Over the weekend I benched 270lbs for a double and a single, squat 440lbs x 3 low-bar with tired and sore hamstrings, pressed 170lbs x 4, and did some barbell rowing, weighted pull ups, and curls. These all match current bests, and two of those current bests are from a higher bw.

Today (Wednesday) I benched 250lbs 5, 5, 4, and 3 – this would be a stall, and I want to fucking kill myself. I low-bar squat 415lbs x 3 after this. Total workout time was 35min.

Speaking of killing myself, I’ve been benching without a spotter in quite a few recent workouts. I’m just tired of asking random scrubs for a spot, and the bar tends to stall closer to lock-out than my chest so every time it doesn’t look like it’s going to go, I’ve managed to take it into the lower pins on the rack, and I set up pretty close to the rack as well. This is how people die benching. Now that I am thinking about how fragile my mortality is I will probably start asking people to spot me.

Here is a chatlog from earlier today with my friend Shawn:

me: sup
sowen41: not too much
working
how about you
sowen41: you know what…
what the fuck
who the fuck drops a sup
and then nothing after
you better have had a fucking stroke or something.
or have spilt something on the key board.
it isn’t a god damn game brent.
god damned slack jawed faggots.
this is absurd.
you said hey
I made time for you
I pushed my paper work aside and thought – HEY I’ll talk to brent.
next time you wanna say ‘sup’ – might as well mail me a letter – and have the postman deliver it to the god damn corpse hanging in the fucking closet…
sowen41: next time why don’t you fucking call. I like hearing a voice in my ear when I’m getting FUCKED like this.
sowen41: maybe fucking pull out next time you bend me over and FUCK me like this…that way I won’t have to fucking have it run down my god damn thigh…
thanks brent…
thanks for FUCKING ME like this.
sowen41: nothing?
no response?
I’d be pretty short winded too after a hardcore fucking like that…
sowen41: hey brent, I hope you have a steady job… because after a fucking like this – there’s no way I can NOT get pregnant.
mother fucker.

There is a girl at work who is nervous and awkward. She is kind of like the new desk receptionist in The Office, the one who likes Michael Scott and dated Andy. I think she is cute. She’s a geek. We spent about 30 minutes having what was essentially a stream-of-consciousness conversation on her part. She is of course living with her ex who she recently broke up with (two days ago). Post thoughts and predictions in comments.

I’ve been collecting some time with a lacrosse ball and my distal extremities … hit my high gastrocs, extensor mass on my forearms, and even distal triceps. The distal triceps were lit the FUCK up by tack-and-stretch, I was sore for about 48 hours after rolling on them, but pressing and front rack seem to feel better. I will prob try another exposure or two. High gastroc tack-and-stretch also seems to help with my squat, makes it easier to keep my knees back and seems to improve the bottom position.

On Sunday I benched 250lbs for 5, 5, 4, and 3 and low-bar squat 405lbs for a triple.

On Monday I snatched 200lbs for a triple and c+jed up to 255lbs without bumpers, then high-bar squat 385lbs for 3×5.

On Wednesday (tonight) I snatched up to 102kg, c+jed 125kg and cleaned 130kg twice. I felt pretty good tonight. Then I front squat 355lbs for a double, 335lbs for a triple, and did RDLs at 315lbs for 8, 7, and 6, which was pretty terrible, I had the white noise sensation fading in and out of my ears. The Rogue Eleiko shredded my left hand open pretty well, that’s going to be a big help to my training and life in general.

This has been a pretty good training week. I’ve consistently felt good in every training session, including on Sunday when I had 3 hours of sleep, worked for 10 hours, and trained with my last intake of solid food having been 5 hours prior to training (I went in fueled with waxy maize and Starbucks).

Tonight there was this fucking guy who thinks he is hot shit, he was deadlifting 525 with straps for a 1rm, a wide stance, and pulled on his toes, then ramped the bar, it just really bothered me, normally this doesn’t bother me but after he pulled it he told this fucking Asian guy, who was pulling in a similar fashion with 275lbs and straps, “Man that was an ugly rep too, I’m kinda pissed about it, it wasn’t as clean as I like,” AS IF THIS FUCKING GUY HAS EVER PULLED A CLEAN REP BEYOND 225 EVER IN HIS ENTIRE LIFE. AS IF HE EVEN HAS THE FUCKING PROPRIOCEPTION TO DISCERN THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN LUMBAR EXTENSION AND EXTREME LUMBAR FLEXION, WHICH IS THE ONLY WAY HE’S EVER PULLED ANYTHING OVER 225.

Added this to my mental checklist of training goals: pull 500lbs+ double overhand hook grip for 5 while this guy is deadlifting and not make a big fucking deal out of it.

I couldn’t be more bothered by this guy.

Then there were two Asians, one of whom had a haircut like Frank Yang complete with blonde highlights??????? being real fucking typical with 10lbs dumbbell lateral raises and just fucking sucking in general, I couldn’t have been more trolled tonight.

Me and Nate were talking late last night about regular people at gyms who have interfered with our workouts in one way or another,

Nathan Liittschwager: one time i was doing clean and jerks
and a group
of fat cardio bunnies was walking by
and of course
came in my line of sight
anyway, i cleaned the weight, then stood up
and jerked it
and one yelped
and jumped back
almost tripping on the machine behind her
she goes “What the fuck, be careful!”
I wish i said something mean
like
go eat more

Brent Kim: dude
i would have
raged for you
at that fucking sow
i would have said
he is controlling more than your bw overhead in an explosive movement
get fucked

Nathan Liittschwager: LOL that would be sweet

Brent Kim: the only thing you can manipulate is cum in your uterus

Nathan Liittschwager: DLKSFJDKL
LOL

Brent Kim: i dunno
i’d be so fucking pissed
because
she is fat because she is a worthless irresponsible piece of shit
and the idea that YOU
nathan fucking littschwager
who trans the fucking oly lifts
should “be careful”

Nathan Liittschwager: i am laughing really hard

Brent Kim: because she walked too close to SOMEONE WHO WAS ACTUALLY LIFTING WEIGHTS
AND DOING SOMETHING SIGNIFICANT
is so outrageous

Dude – one of my pet peeves is bitchy fat girl being a drama queen over shit that is a non-issue. Technically, Nathan was more in danger of being smothered by her than she was of getting hit by the weights, which would have been a good thing. Spar would prob fucking hate this paragraph, but I can’t fucking help it and imo not liking angry, bitter, fat women is pretty fucking justifiable. Be more of a fucking train wreck, please. Body image issues, pretending to be fat-acceptance but having deep-rooted self-loathing for being a goddamn manatee, being a bitter, single militant feminist, not having the capacity to commit to anything that resembles difficulty, trying to pass off “going to school,” “working a job,” “posting my entire life on facebook” as difficult and stressful, fucking try harder please someone might give you the courtesy of pretending to give a shit.

Jacques asks: Could you ever love a FAT girl with NO tits?

If you aren’t aware already, it’s pretty common knowledge that I’m a bit of a chubby chaser. The IGX big earl thread? I like a lot of the girls in that thread. Chubby, “thick,” and even some straight-up fat girls have been attractive to me – they are soft, feel good to cuddle with, and like California, are all rolling curves. The terrain is interesting. And if we’re going to be fucking cereal, YES, one of the big reasons I like chubby chicks is that they often have fat tits. I understand that that’s not everyone’s thing and I wish i cared.

I am not saying I’m exclusively attracted to chubby girls. Pretty smile generally is the only criteria for me to notice a girl. I can grow to love the rest of her if she’s cool enough, whether she has wide child-bearing hips and large round tits, or is petite and demure, or jacked and athletic with low bodyfat.

Anyways to answer the question – as long as I think she has a pretty smile, and she’s a cool person, I could probably love a fat girl with no tits. Unless she is fucking grotesquely obese, because she’d be fucking gross.