Top Blokes

The workshop weekend is complete, and it was pretty solid. I rolled into Shire Speed and Strength with no sleep for a few days (this seems to be my thing) and Pete Upham is a top fucking bloke. He took us to a breakfast joint, got me coffee, had the gym all set up, barbecued chicken for lunch, kept me supplied with water and even an energy drink mid-day, and was taking care of me like a mum should. Thanks for a great weekend, Pete. Here are various pics that Pete took, and a video I have from the morning I arrived.



 

 

 

 

Podcast – Ep. 6 – Ben Claridad

I met Ben Claridad at the 2010 USAW Senior Nationals. He competed this year and has been Olympic weightlifting for 6 years. He’s a pretty interesting dude, so listen to this podcast to hear about

– 2011 Nationals (click here for Ben’s recap)
– The importance of competition experience (and how many meets he has done)
– California Strength
– General weightlifting philosophy
– Coaching
– Art


Download
30:41 minutes

Bro

I met Ben Claridad last year at the USAW Senior Nationals when we weighed in, and we became buds. Later that summer, he let AC and I stay at his house when we did a workshop in Sacramento. Since then I helped convince him to start a blog for his artwork and training, and we still are yet to edit a story that he wrote (fucking call me, bro). Ben competed in this year’s Senior Nationals in the 105+ category so that he could get some extra points for his team, Hassle Free Barbell Club (shout out to Paul Doherty again — he helped me last year at nationals and is a really great guy). Anyway, last year Ben hit 132/160 at nationals and self-described them as looking “like garbage”. This year he hit 143/167 and totaled 310kg after rehabbing from a back injury.





Nice job, Ben. He put on some extra weigh for this competition and will be dieting back down. I assume he’ll be growing his hair too? Ben’s a really good guy and trains really hard.

Now for another video from the continuing saga of Justin and Brent hanging out. A lot of you probably avoid mobility work because it’s hard and uncomfortable. Yeah, it’s a lot of both of those. Here’s the proof.



I also made a video for Saul, because his life is on its last thread.

Conan Better Not Suck



I hate Hollywood. They have a habit of taking really cool ideas and royally fucking them up. Remember the Wolverine movie? It was entertaining, yet irritatingly different than the Wolverine comics where he was a brooding savage. They pussified him, created some idiotic plot that was pretty lame, and then had him shot in the head. The X-Men movies were neat because it was X-Men irl, yet they really left something to be desired for (I thought the coolest parts were the first 15 minutes of meeting Logan: bar fight, snow fight vs Sabertooth, etc.).

In any case, Hollywood typically takes these ideas and adds a bunch of special effects to make them flashy for the midget-sized-attention of the present day American and forego any attempt at an interesting plot or character development. Michael Bay is the biggest shit-head, and South Park mocked him correctly. What’s worse is how the movie is whored around to sell videogames, toys, and other shitty products all in an attempt to earn revenue from starry eyed kids. Remember the shit storm that was “Batman and Robin“? Whenever a movie is aimed at children, it means the movie will be terrible. We saw that with X-Men and Batman (“The Dark Knight” would have been better if it was Rated R, oh, and if they didn’t cast a dipshit as Bruce Wayne) — censoring and dumbing things down for kids results in an all-around shitty product. I don’t know why movies should be directed at kids anyway since it a) makes a shittier product, b) kids are stupid and won’t know the difference anyway, c) kids will appreciate it either way because they are still stupid, and d) kids get too much attention anyway. Their opinion couldn’t be less relevant, especially because they will buy the toys anyway (remember that they are dumb).

I was really skeptical when they cast Jason Momoa as Conan since he largely looks like a tool. I also hated him at first when he played Khal Drogo in “Game of Thrones”, yet he proved his worth in the later episodes (by being fucking crazy). However, this guy should have been Drogo (from “The Quest”).

Momoa still may not be a good Conan despite his neatness in “Game of Thrones”. Here he is trying to look menacing while posteriorily rotating his hips to flex his abs.


He could be bigger. I never saw Thor, but I also thought Chris Hemsworth should have been a lot fucking bigger (he was playing Thor!). These assholes need to weigh at LEAST 235 lbs to play these characters. Someone should send a memo to Hollywood that being ripped and being bigger than your female co-actor are not the same as actually being big.

Momoa doesn’t seem like he fits the Conan characteristics. I haven’t read the early stories by Robert E. Howard (I probably will soon), but Conan is an “amoral swordsman” who is described as a “giant” and “massive”. No human is ever described as stronger than him and he can move like a panther. During his reign as king of Aquilonia, Conan was “… a tall man, mightily shouldered and deep of chest, with a massive corded neck and heavily muscled limbs.” Frankly, Momoa just doesn’t fit that build. Had he put on an extra 20 pounds of muscle, he might.

But it will depend on how the screen writers develop the character and how Momoa can act it out. Momoa did well as the Khal, yet Hollywood screen writers are NOT George R. R. Martin (who clearly doesn’t give a fuck). Screen writers in these big box office movies always create stupid fucking punch lines that are corny enough to incite rage quits everywhere. Not to mention the Conan preview above shows a bunch of special effects in what appears the be the later stages of the film. Special effects always aim to wow the audience and generally degrade the film (see anything that Michael Bay has touched).

I also get irritated with awful fight scenes, so hopefully the fight choreography is better than average. In “Alexander”, the shittiest fucking movie ever, the fight scenes consisted of a camera stuck on a broken clothes washer, zoomed in shots of weapons clanging, and guys making out (I hate that movie so much and Colin Ferrel is SUCH a twat). “Gladiator” and “Troy”, on the other hand, had amazing fight choreography; the Achilles verses Hector fight is one of the best fight scenes ever.

The one saving grace is that there appears to be plenty of gore. I get really pissed when movies shrimp on the blood and guts, especially when there are swords involved. For example, the director’s cut of Lord of the Rings had a lot of orc limbs being severed and generally more orc blood. This was good. Braveheart is the classic big box office movie that included lots of gore, and the first few minutes of the first episode of “Game of Thrones” shows dead children and a beheading. This is not only what I want to see because anything less isn’t realistic. Whenever I read historical accounts of battles, it always goes out of the way to point out how much blood is on the ground. There are usually pools of blood strewn across the battlefield and I’m yet to see a movie show this (except for this scene in Dead Alive — Rippetoe convinced AC and I to watch this movie and it’s the weirdest fucking thing ever).

Look, I’m really particular about my movies that have swords and melee fighting. My dream is to be an extra in a movie like this, bearded and hairy chest fighting with a sword. What else could be better? If there aren’t corny punch lines, plenty of violent killing, boobs and sex (an integral part of Conan lore), and non-shitty special effects fight scenes, then we should be good. But, I ask…
CROOOOM, WHERE IS THE WIZARD THAT KILLED MY MOTHER?
CROOOOM, WHERE ARE THE TWO DRAGONS FACING EACH OTHER?
CROOOOM, IF YOU’RE MY GOD THEN SHOW ME THE WAYYYYYYYYYYYYY

Higher Standards

Over the last several years I’ve really tried to emphasize women training and lifting. I’ll remind a lot of you that in 2008, it was taboo to suggest that something like CrossFit should include strength training, yet nowadays women who lift are a regular part of the “online training culture”. The functional fitness and strength training communities produce women who not only perform well, but also look very good. It’s important to note the aesthetics of women in these training methodologies since women’s fashion includes physical appearance as well as accessorizing (clothing in this case). It’d be naive to think that appearance wasn’t an issue in either gender, but more foolish to think that female society doesn’t revolve around looks and fashion — training communities are no different. However, the functional fitness and strength communities like to poke fun at the body building communities.

The only difference between a bodybuilding community and other training communities are the means to an end. Everyone here has seen girls running around in panties, sports bras, and knee-high socks while doing a workout. We’ve also seen figure competitors pose for photo shoots or get on stage in hardly a bikini. I’m not complaining about either scenario, but they aren’t very different from one another. Figure competitors aren’t in a dehydrated state constantly throughout the year, and in order to develop the musculature needed to win they have to lift weights, eat properly, and they are usually pretty damn strong.


Direct your focus to :44 seconds.

There’s a lot going on here, but I want to direct your attention to Trish Warren squatting 135 lbs for the photo shoot. It’s not that she’s squatting it, it’s that she’s just repping it out like it’s a fucking joke…because it is. Here’s a gal that is trying to be seductive in this photo shoot while also showing off the physique that she’s built. She’s probably trying to catch a pump in her quads for the pics Regardless of how she’s built this physique, she has definitely done it by using barbells and dumbbells and eating properly. Some may suggest various fake aspects of her — steroids, boobs, tan, etc. — but they aren’t any different than what other women use in other training communities (including the functional fitness community). Trish is definitely strong. She can probably hit an easy set of 40 full range of motion push-ups, then stand up and squat 225 for a set of five, then rack the bar and run 400 meters in 60 seconds. The specifics are irrelevant; what matters is that she trained differently yet has similar capabilities because she has established a good base of musculature by getting strong and vice versa. The functional fitness female is similar — she looks great on the account of developing strength and musculature while eating well. In either case, the results are the same.

Trish Warren

Regardless of whether narcissism is existant (in wanting to show off the newly crafted body in the gym, photos, or competition) women can get great results from busting their ass and training hard. Strength training can easily be programmed with up tempo barbell complexes, circuit training, or conditioning. To me, it seems like the best results stem from girls who are strong, yet also do high-rep lighter weight training on the side (I’m not suggesting this should be the case, it’s just my observation of seeing women in CF and globo gyms). Results won’t be quick for most girls and they should maintain their patience in a program. Most girls that have athletically appealing bodies have developed them over time, have a predisposition to that body type, or are using. Either way, training hard will be necessary.

With that being said, since being a girl and lifting weights is so en vogue, it almost seems like some women think that they get to stop there. “I do one strength lift before my conditioning workout and now I’m smug,” kind of seems to be the internet attitude. Reference the above video to see Trish smashing out about 40 reps with 135 (she also makes Marzia Prince look thin) and you’ll see that she’s not really impressed with doing one strength lift a day. Observe the following video:



Annie Moniqui clean and jerks 105 kg in that video. That’s 231 pounds that she’s pulling, front squatting, and then sticking overhead. Weighing 58kg, or a little less than 130 lbs. That’s pretty damn impressive.

Now that you are a female who trains, you no longer get a cookie just for doing the lifts. Instead, devote yourself into that training and consistently improve. Don’t just get stronger than the anorexic girl who rang you up at the super market, get strong for a woman that trains. Eat right, train hard, and do it consistently. The activity of lifting revolves around performance, not attendance. You are now held to higher standards. Do something about it.

And if you needed more motivation, here’s a Finnish girl who is doing a completely dead hang chin-up with 105.5kg total weight (including body weight). This should motivate some of you dudes, too.