Please respond.

Pressed 175lbs x 4, 3, 2 and front squat 355lbs x 4 on Monday. I feel like if I wasn’t super-setting my front squat warm-ups with my pressing work sets I could have taken 355lbs x 5 for a pretty substantial PR, my downfall on this was my right bicep cramping up in the front rack. I could have done more ring dips. I could have done more front squats.

On Tuesday I just did good mornings, didn’t have time for anything else, I could have done more oly lifts.

You guys ever taken a dump at work and gotten walked-in on? It’s happened twice to me. By the same doctor. I go into the single-person bathroom, think I’ve locked the door, sit down and start checking out facebook and whatnot on my phone, I see the door handle turn and the door open and the doc barges in, sees me with my scrub pants down to my fucking ankles taking a fucking shit, then turns around very quickly and closes the door behind him without a word. This happened tonight, and before that it was a few months ago. At this point, the doctor probably thinks I want this to happen. Who lets this happen TWICE? Oh the first time didn’t bother me enough, let me leave the opportunity for someone to witness this fucking disaster more than once.

This last time his face showed more irritation and disgust than surprise and apology. I was thinking – is he sickened by my exhibitionist behavior? By my desperate thirst for attention which is so great I bait people into coming to watch me defecate? Hey man you wanna see me stick my thumb in my butt hole while you’re at it? I got it all, baby. Please respond.

George writes:

You know what, Brent? You know fucking what? I don’t really believe in much anymore. I used to have hopes and dreams and ideals, but one by one they went away as I realized that I am a piece of shit garbage athlete aspie beta fuck so I just wrote them off as being silly and pretended to move on it’s fine have you ever read The Stranger by Camus?
Speaking of Asian movies (can’t say films or cinema because I might come off as a hipster even though I’m wearing large glasses and own a lot of flannel) Have you seen What Time is it There? Might be up your alley.

My dog shit in the kitchen while I was writing this.

I loled. Haven’t seen the movie or read the book.

Hey man – I believe in you. I believe in you and I hope you decide to do what you have to do. Keep your passion alive.

cmoney writes:

Your philosophy prof lifts jellydick weights, and so do you.
Next you’re going to on about how the high bar back squat is some Kantian metaphor for man’s place in this world.
This isn’t fucking livejournal. This isn’t some lib arts college coffee shop where the betas all wax intellectual in vain attempts at pathetic intercourse.
This is brent fucking kim’s blog and he’s pretty fucking strong and he’s getting stronger. Lost in humorous emo musings is the fact that he’s approaching a 2xBW c+j.
The only prof that matters is Professor Pump. Now kindly stfu.

I actually like to think of my blog comments as a pretty chill coffee shop. Maybe the room in the gym just before the weight room, that room that’s got a lot of open space and some kind of turf or firm carpeting and a few pull up bars and various rigs where everyone can mob. But in this room anyone can talk about whatever they want, and actually from what it sounds like, The Myth of Sisyphus, like the tagline for Old Boy, fits the subject matter of this blog to a fucking T. I like that the people in my comments have personality, in addition to the guys who spam copypastas.

“He’s pretty fucking strong,” nah. “Approaching a 2x bw c+j.” At 156lbs bw, no one cares. But hey man, thanks for the support, I appreciate your enthusiasm and I’m happy you think I matter. It almost makes ME think I matter.

karibot writes:

That’s a good name for a workout log.
The beginning: “There is but one truly serious philosophical problem, and that is suicide.”
The end: “The struggle itself toward the heights is enough to fill a man’s heart. One must imagine Sisyphus happy.”
It’s perfect in every way.

Yeah when I read this I was like, this is my life. This is my future. Let my heart fill.

Steven writes:

I appreciate you writing this blog. It gives me not only a good read between classes, but because of my schedule I always have to train alone so I feel like we’re training partners. Even though we’ve never met and I’m basically a voyeur to your life. Thanks.

Perfectly normal, perfectly healthy.

Matt writes:

I was talking with a scientist and he told me that ~40% of the chinese population and take test and it will not show up in there piss for some scientfic reason he explained. You should research and see if this could benefit you since you are asian.
If you were on a deserted island and had a barbell but the weight had to be a fixed amount(welded or old school globe style), what weight amount would you choose and why?

First part sounds made up.

I’d prob do like a 100lbs barbell and just do lots of curls and front raises every day with it. Why? Because I can’t think of much else to do. I could say “275lbs” and then just proceed to do max-rep c+js with it, that’s assuming I wouldn’t do something dumb attempting 91% of my best c+j without any other warm-up. I could say “400lbs” and do the same thing with deads, or maybe 185lbs and do max-rep clean and presses but these all seem pointless because of my current woefully inadequate strength.

Tiny writes:

How do you feel about this:
or do you not like to trip while you hop?
If you don’t like its fine, I’ll get you something else….
Please respond.

Not really my thing. Music has to either make me want to fucking kill myself (see: Radiohead – Bulletproof) or make me want to either dance or bang out some fucking presses:

Leave a comment ?


  1. Ohhhhh Brent…I haven’t laughed so hard since I was a little girl.

    Seriously, this is your most humorous post yet. Well done.

  2. Brent, how does this video make you feel?

  3. I don’t think that would bug me so much, I mean the door is locked, it’s his fault. It definitely isn’t pleasant but who cares, everyone poops.

    Also, do you say Stay safe/I’ll be praying for you/Please respond IRL? I do, and apparently real people find it as funny as internet people. Even without context.

  4. Next time he walks in on you, casually ask him for a spot. Or just be polite and ask him if he wants to work in. Simple etiquette, you savage.

  5. Just take a dump with the door open, the doc won´t be going anywhere near the bathroom when you´re around after that.

  6. Do you not have a fart fan to indicated someone is taking the browns to the superbowl?

  7. You should read Choke by Chuck Palahniuk. I think it would help you get to the root of why you leave the bathroom door unlocked.

    • is this a good read? i picked it up some time ago, but never really did anathing with it…

      • I thought it was good. Just go into it knowing that his stuff can get kind of graphic. It would probably offend people who aren’t totally desensitized by the internet like myself 😎

        • Palahniuk cannot write a good ending to a book to save his life, but everything before the last two-five chapters will be pretty decent. There is much better writers out there though, just saying.

          • Choke is the only book I have read of his. I started Diary, but I thought it was shit and gave it back to my friend.

  8. Mr. Kim,

    This is a great post. Defecation humor is the best kind of humor.


  9. Bront,
    Please keep the jams coming.

  10. Welp, seeya later!

    Brent when you squat (meaning high bar) do you try to stay real tight on the descent and rebound back up from just below parallel or do you just dive bomb into it and sort of bounce off of your calves out of the bottom? The low bar cues about rebounding up off of tightened hamstrings don’t seem to work so well for high bar. I find that cutting it off anywhere above ATG feels arbitrary and unnatural please respond. Also depression, unrequited love, etc.

    And I know you are riding the corgi train these days but you should do yourself a favor and google bloodhound puppies I have one he is awesome.

  11. hey brent, i hope all is well! havent gotten the chance to chit-chat in a while. with that being said, i would also like to take time to let you know that daft punk fucking sucks.

  12. I think this blog is making people with poor self esteem, have even worse. It doesn’t seem healthy. But for the rest of us, it’s entertaining as hell. Bravo.

    • I disagree. My self esteem has sky rocketed because I know that I can kill myself whenever I want. I finally have free will.

  13. I think 70sBrent is a pretty cool guy. Eh poops with the door unlocked and doesn’t afraid of anything.

  14. Hi Brent,

    I like this group alot, seems like you might dig them too. It’s called Mux Mool.
    GOod for warmups.

  15. Ah, this blog sure makes the weight of the world somewhat lighter. Not that it changes the way I am but it comforts by pointing out that Im not the only miserable beta male around and that being a Nice Guy isnt all bad.

    Can totally relate to the bathroom story, I do have a similar experience that comes to mind, although it only occurred once I felt severely exposed. Anyhow, this story took place in my former workplace, I had finished working for the day and figured I should shower before going home so I undressed and wrapped a towel around my waist as is customary. The showers were in the middle of the dressing room and with five bathrooms (those small tiny ones with room only for the actual toilet and a paper roll) facing the showers. Anyhow, for whatever reason (probably several cups of coffe that day) my stomach all of a sudden needed utmost attention so I went in, put my towel on the wall and started doing my business. Out of nowhere this random coworker storms in (as I forgot to lock) and sees me, stark naked while performing fecal convulsions. None of us said a word, he just went out again and I quickly locked the door behind him. The whole spectacle was over in seconds but I will never forget the look on his face…

    A bit graphic perhaps but you get the idea. Anyways, keep up th good work!

  16. You didn’t tell us the story where you crashed and burned while hitting on chicks in your gym.

  17. man talk more about lifting

  18. How about you kick it old school with some pioneering synth from 1979:

  19. You’re wearing a black dress, with white polka dots all over it. It comes to just above knee length and exposes just a bit too much cleavage. Underneath you’re wearing a pair of tights and some simple black ballet flats. You look stunning, and you know it. I haven’t been able to keep my eyes off of you all day. I hope you haven’t noticed me staring but one or two coy grins when our eyes have met have indicated otherwise. With that said, we’re still spending time together and if anything your attitude seems slightly flirtatious and playful. Surely it’s not just my mind imagining that you seem to be leaning forward more, almost daring me to peek at your cleavage again.

    We’ve come back to your flat and are now standing in the kitchen. You’ve mentioned something about making tea and are now searching through the pantry. What you do next makes me certain you know exactly the effect you are having on me. Finishing searching through the top cupboards, you bend over to search the bottom, and keeping your back arched you slowly lean down. Your thighs look fantastic inside the pantyhose and my eyes travel upwards, admiring the shape of your bum. I decide that it’s now or never and make a move.

    You turn around from the pantry, a cheshire cat grin on your face, expecting to see me standing mouth agape on the other side of the kitchen. Instead I am almost immediately behind you. I grab you forcefully with both of my hands just above your elbow. I see your eyes go wide at the unexpected advance, possibly with fear but also with excitement mingled in. I pull you in close and lower my mouth on to the side of your neck. My first kiss is firm, almost hard. I’m still excited by the fact that it has happening and the adrenalin is coursing through my veins. I steady myself, decreasing the intensity and savouring your beautiful skin and smell. I kiss up your neck until I am at your lips. I kiss you gently at first and then push you back half a step. Your eyes snap open and I crack a half smile at catching you unawares. You regain composure quickly though and smirk back at me, a challenge that I will not catch you off guard again.

    I pull you against me again by your arms again, then remove them briefly to move them elsewhere. You take this chance to try and pull away. I chuckle and grab you by one arm, spinning you around so your back is now against my chest. One arm wraps firmly around your waist while the other hand travels up to your neck, with two fingers gently stroking the soft skin across the front of your throat. I lean in to kiss along your collarbone and as I do so my arm travels up from your waist, the hand finding your breasts and squeezing gently, then pinching your nipples slightly. You gasp slightly and I laugh quietly again and then whisper in your ear ‘you haven’t seen anything yet’. The hand leaves your breast and travels down to in between your thighs. I lift your skirt up and as I do so, notice a tear in your hose. I put two fingers in and pull them up, widening the hole and allowing me access to your delicious thighs. My hand on your neck has now taken a more commanding grip, choking you ever so lightly. I can now fit my hand inside the hole and do so, sliding it along the inside of your thigh and angling upwards. I brush briefly against your underpants, which feel to be already slightly wet.
    The feeling of my fingertips brushing against your underpants excites me further and I move the hand away from your thighs and instead to the zip on the back of your dress. You struggle briefly but I tighten my hand on your throat so slightly and you understand the message. I pull the zip down and slide the dress off of your shoulders. Your body is even more beautiful than I imagined, and I stop all movement for a second to simply step back and admire it. Again you notice my weakness and go to move away. You almost do but I manage to get a hand on yours. I again pull you in close to me, kissing you deeply. As I pull away I bite your lip slightly. My arms are wrapped around you and I remove one to start unbuttoning my shirt, then undo my belt. I place a hand on the back of your head and pull in to kiss you again. Midway through the kiss, my hand on roughly takes a fistful of your hair and you gasp in to my mouth. I pull my head back and say “Now you will see what happens for all this teasing, Rachael”.
    I guide you over to the kitchen counter by your hair. I am firm but not rough, I’ve no need to be. I bend you over it, taking my other hand and rubbing it over the back of your thighs and up to your bum. I grasp it with one hand before letting go and again slowly massaging my hand over it. I give you no warning for the first smack, a gentle one but the surprise makes it sting. I follow it again shortly with another one on the other side. I rub my hand gently over your bum and ask “Do you know why this is happening, Rachael?”. You don’t respond and my hand quickly stops rubbing and comes down again with another smack on each cheek, in rapid succession. I explain “This is because you are a naughty, dirty little girl, who teases and flirts”. I open up the drawer next to where you are bent over and spot a wooden spoon. I pull it out and drag it slowly over your pantyhose covered skin. I let you feel the sensation, let it sink in that this next one will sting. I bring the head down sharply across your backside and hear you moan as I do so. I say “Miss McKay, I think you’re actually enjoying this punishment!” and bring the spoon down again, harder this time. “Only dirty girls like being spanked, so that makes it quite obvious what you are” I say, repeating the word “dirty” each time I bring the spoon back down. I leave the spoon on the counter and rub my hand gently over where you’ve just been spanked.
    After a short while, I reach down in to the drawer again and pull out a knife. I ask you to be calm to avoid mishaps and you comply. I lean down and insert the blade in to the hole I had started earlier, being careful not to mark your skin. I guide it upwards and the sharp blade easily cuts through the fabric. Soon there is a large cut right through the middle and I replace the knife in the drawer and remove your pantyhose. My hand leaves the back of your head and I gently guide you up off the counter so that you’re standing up. I wrap my arms around you, gently kissing your neck and nibbling on your ear love before whispering “now how about I take you upstairs to your bedroom and make it all better?”.

    We’re now in your room, me laying on top of you as we kiss. I lost my trousers somewhere on the hurried rush to your bed (which has freshly ironed sheets) and you’re able to feel my hardness pressed against you. I move from kissing your lips to nibbling on your earlobe, then travel down your neck, on to your chest. I lightly kiss the top of your breasts and continue down, kissing your stomach and then ending above the line of your underpants. As expected, you’re wearing gorgeous lingerie. Black, with lace and some sheer panels providing some tempting glimpses of your body below. I slide my body down between your thighs and begin to kiss and lick the inside of them. Your skin is perfect, like cream. Beautifully white, with just the right combination of firm but soft. Gradually my mouth travels further up your thighs until my mouth hovers above your pants… A thin layer of fabric all that separates me from your body. I kiss over the top of it a few times, before looping my fingers in to the waist band and dragging them down your superb legs. I return to my previous position and begin to kiss the smooth bare skin above your snatch, then travel further south and find your clit with my tongue. I tease gently at first, applying minimal pressure. As I do this, you feel my finger gently enter you, moving in and out a few times before curling it backwards to massage your g-spot. I’ve begun to apply more pressure to your clit with my tongue, using long firm strokes. I insert another finger inside of you, moving my hand more quickly now and continuing to massage your g-spot. My free hand reaches underneath you to dig fingers in to your gorgeous ass and pull you harder on to my face. I hear you sigh softly and I become firmer still, squeezing your ass quite hard and applying more pressure to your g-spot. I feel your hands in my hair, pulling my face against you as your legs wrap over my shoulders. Shortly after this, your sighs turn to moans and begin to intensify and I begin to feel you cum.
    I lessen the intensity until I am barely touching you and then begin to kiss my way back up your body. I kiss first your neck and then softly, your lips, letting you see how good you taste. I lay down next to you and trace fingers over your body as you catch your breath. I scoop an arm underneath you and roll you over so you are on top of me. I teasingly drag my fingernails down your back, then place a hand on the back of your head taking a fistful of hair again, guiding you up so that you are sitting on top of me. I tell you to remove your bra and you do so. Your breasts are incredible, soft, smooth and full. I place my hands underneath them feeling all of their delicious weight as I gently rub your nipples with my thumbs. I smirk and then pinch them slightly, causing you to to slap my hands away. I laugh reach back up, this time taking them both in my hands and digging my fingers in, being almost rough with them. I say “remember who is in control Miss McKay, and what happens to naughty girls”. You lean down to kiss me, and I give you a playful slap on the bum. I roll you back over on to your back and stand up to take my underpants off. I rejoin you on the bed, my legs between your own, kissing your beautiful, luxuriant lips and relishing your smell. While one arm props me above you, the other hand slides fingers up the side of your body, briefly circling your nipple and then moving to softly stroke your neck. I lift my head up and look in to your eyes, then lean down to kiss you. As I do this, my fingers turn from soft stroking to a grip around your neck and I enter you.
    I moan as I do, pausing for a second to savour the sensation. I look in to your eyes, hand on your throat and begin to slowly move in and out of you. Your eyes are again a mixture of fear and excitement. I loosen my grip on your neck and begin to increase my pace, taking the hand from your neck to the back of your head. I pull back on your hair, causing you to arch your head back and exposing your neck. I lean in and bite the beautiful white skin, gently dragging my teeth over it. I move my hand from your head down on to your clit, rubbing it briefly as I thrust in and out. I then lift the hand up and place the fingers in your mouth, as I look in to your eyes. Just as I expected, you relish the opportunity and like a good dirty girl begin sucking them dutifully, your full lips forming a tight seal.
    I roll over, keeping you pulled tight against me so that you are now on top. I push you upwards so that you are sitting on top of me and then take a firm grip around your waist, rocking your hips back and forth over my cock. You look gorgeous seated on me, like some statue made real. Your skin’s a perfect ivory, your body has perfect dimensions and watching your facial expressions as you feel me rock against your g-spot is driving me mad. I let you gain momentum and then move my hands up to your breasts, taking them in to my hands and beginning to squeeze them, harder and harder. You are quickening your face on top of me and I see your face flushed red as the mix of pleasure and pain teases your mind. I place my hands back on your waist and assist you with your momentum, pushing you down harder on top of me each time. Soon you throw your head back and moan as you begin to cum again, and though I know the sensitivity is skyrocketing I persist for a moment in continuing to rock you over my cock. You reach down to try and move my hands to stop me but you’re not nearly strong enough, especially in this state, and I move you for another 5 or 10 seconds.
    I slow the movements and pull you down on top of me, stroking your hair and whispering how much of a dirty little girl you are in to your ear. I lift you up off of me and instruct you to bend over on all fours on the bed. I position myself behind you, admiring your gorgeous round bum. I enter you from behind, forcefully as I become more and more aroused by you. I look down and notice that the red marks I left earlier have begun to fade and remark to you that this simply will not do. I smack your arse hard with my bare hand, causing you to cry out and bury your head in the pillow. I reach forward and pull your head up by the hair, as I thrust in and out. This time I maintain my grip on the base of your hair as I smack your arse again, leaving a large red hand print on the white skin. You cry out again and arch your back up. I move my head from your hair to grab on of your breasts and squeeze it in my fingers as I feel the tension building inside of my stomach. I continue to pull your hips against mine, my senses being overloaded by the incredible sights and sensations. You bury your head in to the pillow again as I increase my speed. I smack your bum on the other side and then place both hands on your hips and pull you in tight as I begin to fill myself cum, the energy and tension from the events releasing all at once.
    I lay down next to you and you place your head on my chest. I kiss your forehead and play my fingers through your hair…

  20. cmoney,

    I need to know your thoughts on this blog post before I bother reading it. Please post ASAP.


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