You Are Average

“You gotta make sacrifices if you wanna be 70’s Big”

Go ahead and face it now; you are average. If you were a genetic freak, somebody would have noticed by now. More than likely you are sitting here reading this, and you want to be stronger and like learning about guys that are strong (or you like looking at guys that are strong…and are female?). In any case, you aren’t in that small percentage of the gene pool that are genetically predisposed to being freakishly strong.

Do you realize what this means? You have to get strong and big with good ol’ fashion hard work.

There are no shortcuts. You have to follow a carefully made training program. You have to eat more than you want to, especially when you don’t want to. You have to find the energy to conquer that last work set of squats or deadlifts when nobody is around and there is no glory. You have to realize that if you avoid doing the things that are hard, then you are preventing yourself from accomplishing your goals.

How badly do you want to be strong? How badly do you want to be competitive? How badly do you want to be 70’s Big?

We look up to the demigods of 70’s Big yore (above), and they are gifted individuals. They undoubtedly worked hard, but you may not be so genetically fortunate. You will need to bust your ass for the same progress that others can make easily. You cannot afford to dick around with training, eating, or rest. You don’t have time to allow yourself to make excuses, so don’t bother.

So, sit down tonight and have a beer (Note: not fermented deer piss). As you sip, think about how your training can improve on Monday. Figure out what you can do better.

’Cause you gotta make sacrifices if you wanna be 70’s Big.

Click “read more” for more fun.

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Some comments to the critics:

The use of 70’s Big instead of ’70s Big is intentional. The apostrophe insinuates possession since the quality of being big is owned by the seventies (in our case).

It’s also important to note that someone who is considered 70’s Big did not have to be active in the seventies nor do they have to be donning seventies garb. The name has become a concept that signifies being strong and big. When someone is called 70’s Big, it is of the highest achievement someone can attain, short of a world or Olympic championship.

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This articlefrom Boing Boing entertained me thoroughly. It references a supposedly poorly photoshopped picture of this Ralph Lauren model. Apparently Ralph Lauren tried to shut down their ISP, and Boing Boing had this to say in response:

So, to Ralph Lauren, GreenbergTraurig, and PRL Holdings, Inc: sue and be damned. Copyright law doesn’t give you the right to threaten your critics for pointing out the problems with your offerings. You should know better. And every time you threaten to sue us over stuff like this, we will:

a) Reproduce the original criticism, making damned sure that all our readers get a good, long look at it, and;

b) Publish your spurious legal threat along with copious mockery, so that it becomes highly ranked in search engines where other people you threaten can find it and take heart; and

c) Offer nourishing soup and sandwiches to your models.

Fantastic. Over the past year whenever I’ve seen a skinny girl, I’ve said that she needed x number of sandwiches (depending on how skinny). The Ralph Lauren look-a-likes need a cheeseburger. With bacon.

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Finally, let’s finish our week-long Pisarenko dedication with a video of him clean and jerking his personal best (and just short of the overall world record) 265 kilograms — an asinine 584.225 pounds:



P.S. T-shirts are coming.