“Winky Dinky Hocake. Cause hoes got to eat, too.”
(Good luck with that one)
I am not very creative with titles, so there you go. Learn to cook.
Cooking for yourself ensures that you get exactly what you need to get 70’s Big. It is also more cost effective than eating out and (hopefully) a hell of a lot cleaner. And it’s a useful skill to have. Modern man should know the difference between a Wok and a saucepan.
I realized early on that most girls my age weren’t spending much time in the kitchen and that if I wanted to keep eating well, I would have to feed myself. Fortunately my mom was (and still is) a good cook. She taught me the basics of cooking and how to make my favorite dishes. I learned a few more things over the years and, at some point, became a moderately competent cook.
So learn. That is all there is to it. Help your mom/wife/girlfriend/mistress/live-in-tranny. Watch a cooking show. Take a class. Do whatever you need to do to learn to cook. You would be surprised at how simple some of your favorite dishes are to make.
Your first assignment is an easy one. Make some Texas Chili this weekend. To help with this, Jacob Cloud has sent in a video. This video has everything: history, training, Texas beer, mild hazing, and skillet corn bread! Yes!
Here is his recipe list:
2 lbs course ground beef
2.5 lbs tri-tip, trimmed and cubed
1 can peeled whole tomatoes
1 can Rotel
1-2 minced jalapenos (more or less depending on how spicy you want it)
4-5 crushed/minced garlic cloves
1/2-1 cup chopped white onion
1/4-1/2 cup chopped cilantro
Lime juice from 1 large lime
Thickener (corn starch, masa, flour, etc)
6 pack of Texan beer
Chili Mix (all measurements heaping!):
2-3 tbsp chili powder
1+ tbsp cumin
1 tsp ancho chili powder
1 tsp chipotle chili powder
1 tsp paprika
1 tsp cayenne
1 tsp Mexican oregano leaves
1-2 tsp black pepper (to taste)
1-2 tsp salt (to taste)
Jacob notes that you can be a real man by adding some habanero peppers to the mix. You can also make JM Blakely happy by using MSG instead of salt (like they do in chili cookoffs).
So go forth and make chili. Then shove a 90’s small guy into a snow drift.
Note: Andy Gann also provided a recipe that looks outstanding. This will be on the updated FAQ when I get to it this weekend.
Note: Yes, it’s PR Friday. Post weights lifted, gained, or consumed.